I wasn’t in the best place after my last blog post. I was very down; my counselor said I wasn’t depressed, but what I was experiencing was grief and anger. That sounded about right to me. A week ago, I hit a breaking point, but after a ton of crying for a few days and a one hour massage, I felt a lot better. It’s hard trying to stay positive about getting to the finish line when the finish line keeps constantly shifting.
Cancelling the trip to Yellowstone was a huge disappointment, but on a positive note, Delta reimbursed me my miles with no penalty (should have been $150 per ticket) and Priceline refunded all but $40 of our non-refundable rental. Both companies got doctor’s notes, so I’m extremely thankful that they both were so understanding and compassionate. So I’m only out $92 for the trip instead of the over $600 I was expecting.
That’s good news because the $1,300 I had planned for Yellowstone is now going towards a new air conditioning unit and heat pump as when I got home from the All-Star race yesterday, the A/C was not working. I had wanted to buy myself a consolation prize for not being able to go on the trip, but this was not what I had planned. I’m going to be out $4,230 total, but at least they can fix it tomorrow. I’m staying with my next door neighbor (thanks Anne for putting me up last night and tonight), but I feel so bad for my kitties as all I can do for them is leave fans on in this 90 degree weather. I guess God works in mysterious ways – he must have known I’d need that Yellowstone money for this, or at least that’s what I’m believing to make me feel better about not being in Yellowstone as I type this.
Medically, things are looking up. I’m feeling better now I’m off that anti-biotic for almost a week now. I saw the infectious disease doctor this morning and he says everything looks good. He said the most critical time for an infection to recur is the first two weeks and tomorrow will be one week clear. He said they can flare back up months down the road; but we just won’t know. Only time will tell.
I start the expansion process on June 3. I’m not looking forward to it as this will be the third time I’ve gone through this and it is painful, usually having me in a pain for a couple of days following the procedure. I will expand every Friday in June and early July. At that point, we can set the next surgery date. I’m not looking forward to spending all my upcoming weekends in pain on the couch, but it is what it is. I’m just soldiering on the best I can.
As best I can tell, I’ve got at least two surgeries left, this next one in late July/early August and then one more three months after that. I know we’ll have some final touches, but I’m not sure how long I have to wait for those.
All I can hope for is in 2012 (I guess not 2011) that I can use all my vacation days for vacation!!!
Love to you all!
Marcy
